The Work of Learning How to Receive

it’s easy to let this season of mistrust rob us of our grace...don't fall for it.

happy Sunday loves,

hope everyone is ok in these totally normal and unprecedented time and staying cool in this totally normal heat. it's been a minute since i've hit your inbox. i also make myself a promise i'm going to be more consistent, but we'll see…

this week i had this realization…

No one tells you how much work it takes to rewire your brain and reset your spirit to allow amazing things to happen after experiencing trauma and pain.

In the last couple of weeks, I've been forced to ask for help. and I say forced because I don't like am growing in asking for it.

I am typically the person who has historically been the strong one, the wise one, the person everyone turns to for answers, advice and solutions. By nature of my job, I am the one who advises and guides. who helps figure out things for others – friends, billionaires, tech CEOs, teams, family or just people I feel compelled to help.

I love it. I love being of service. I love pouring into others. I am wired to help others move things forward and it brings me a lot of joy.

But lately, I've needed help. I hate I am learning to ask for help.

We've been spending the last few years building why?! – this strange, beautiful thing we call a social network – because we believe that there's a better way to exist and connect online in a real way. But on some days, it feels borderline impossible in this environment.

We are living in such an uncertain time. a time that feels like everything is collapsing. A looming (and present) war. A spiritual famine. Polarization is so deep people don’t even want to know each other anymore. Everyone is trying to win on the internet.

I reached out to a good friend with the truth: “I don’t know if we’re going to make it.”

We need help. So I made a small request to ask if he would do some work for us out of the goodness of his heart. He not only said yes, but he responded with so much more support. So many more resources. His network, his time, his wisdom. With no strings attached.

He just said, “Let me do this for you. You’ve done so much for me. It would be my honor.”

And I almost couldn’t take it. I didn’t believe it. And it’s taken me some time to receive it.

My first thought was: what’s the catch?

He must want something. Maybe he wants equity. He must think I’m desperate. He must be trying to rescue me so he can control me or try and steal my company from me. I had every reason not to receive it. I questioned it. Scrutinized it. Spun stories about it. Anything to avoid simply saying: thank you.

This truth came back to me that I'm learning on this journey building outside the system:

When you’re conditioned to believe your value comes from what you give, it is terrifying to be on the receiving end of grace.

One of the things I've been most surprised by coming out of the modern workplace system is how much we've measured by our output. It's been the core metric of success most of my life. What have you done… what have you produced… what do you have to show for yourself…

In God’s economy, love is not earned. Rest is not a reward. Support is not just a transaction, it's a gift. And if we are going to build anything that lasts, especially something rooted in truth and goodness, we are going to have to get better at receiving. Receiving help. Receiving love. Receiving feedback. Receiving support. Receiving joy. Receiving miracles.

It’s a deep unlearning.

Becoming our best work is about whether or not your spirit can hold the weight of goodness without suspicion. Whether or not your nervous system can tolerate peace. Whether or not you can believe that someone is showing up for you not because they want something, but because you matter.

In a time like this when so many people are burned out, tapped out, and on edge it’s easy to let mistrust rob us of our help.

Pain isolates. Trauma makes us suspicious. This cultural moment has taught us to brace for betrayal. But if we’re not careful, we’ll reject the very people sent to carry us forward.

So here’s what I’m practicing in this season:

• Letting people help without over-explaining.

• Saying thank you instead of deflecting.

• And receiving what I’ve spent years giving.

I will not let this time in the world steal my belief that there are good, kind and generous people in this world. because I know I am one of them and I know there's more of us than there are of them.

sending you so much love wherever you are,

m